Sincerely, The Vagina Movement

By Diana May-Waldman,Worldwidehippies – Dear Crazy Republicans,
I realize it is an election year. I get that. And I understand that you don’t want to talk about the economy, jobs, the environment, war or gas prices. I know that in times of stress or when you have nothing of importance to say you start talking about women and it seems to me that you like to cut to the chase and zoom right in on the vagina. Women and vaginas. Two things you know little about.

Now I also realize that you have a few female Republicans yakking about vaginas too. To them I say that they should mind their own vagina business and keep their nose out of mine.

See, I grew up in the 1960s and 70s and the last time I checked my vagina was my business. My mother worked very hard to teach me that. She told me that my vagina was private and that I had complete control over it, in most cases. I have the right to pick and choose and make the decisions about my vagina. After all, it’s MY vagina.

VAGINA. Why don’t you just come right out and say it. Say the word. VAGINA. Quit skirting around the issue. Just say it, Say that you want control over vaginas.

See, I am not stupid. The reason that you keep bringing up abortion and birth control and trans-vaginal probing is because it’s all about vaginas. If I had a penis, I wouldn’t even be writing this letter. You and your cronies are obsessed with vaginas.

I kind of don’t blame you. Vaginas are magical. I’m 100% certain that someone squeezed your big, obnoxious heads through a vagina. And now that you are grown up, I’m pretty sure that you are no longer vagina worthy. You are no longer worthy, because you don’t want to make friends with vaginas. You want to own one. You want to be the boss of one, tell it what to do, punish it and so on.

You have “vagina envy.”

I get that, too.

I once wrote a poem about wanting a penis.

Penis

I want a penis
I want to give birth to it
so I can teach it to be nice.
Teach it to be gentle,
teach it how to love.
I want it to ejaculate itself on the floor
spread it into the wood
and teach it how to be perfect history
without war and bloody hands.
I want to wash it, dry it,
hang it out to dry on a sunny day.
I want to set it on the window sill
have it look out at the flowers,
look to the sky and listen to the sound
of a child’s laughter.
I want to introduce it to my friends,
have them pet it nicely, never being afraid.
I want my penis to feel the tears of women
and understand the animal cruelty of its nature.
I want my penis to be deaf, never listening
to the voices that define what it means to be a man.

Now, did I say in my poem, that I wanted to take a hammer to it? Did I say I wanted to slam it in a door? Or smash it with a rubber mallet? Did I say I wanted to stick a kabob skewer down the tip of your penis?

No, I didn’t say anything bad about the penis. The poem was about wanting men to find gentleness and to not define themselves by their penises.

So, why do you want to keep attacking our vaginas?

Now you bring up this trans-vaginal probing crap. You want to force women to have a vaginal ultra-sound probing if she chooses to have an abortion. You want to punish the vagina.

And now you have some of my sisters screaming that this procedure is rape. I’ve been real torn on this. Rape is a powerful word. Probing women against their will is awful. It’s damn bloody, fucked up, for sure. It stinks real bad. And you have no damn right to do it.

But, is it rape? Pretty close to it, But, this is a double whammy here—each time we scream this vagina hating procedure is rape, we diminish rape. We become desensitized to what rape really is and we discount all sisters have gone through it and survived it..

What bothers me about your trans-vaginal probing bullshit is that you think you and the government should have control over vaginas. Who died and made you boss? Just who the fuck do you think you are that you FEEL you are entitled to have any say what-so-ever about a woman’s vagina? Why you arrogant, self serving fuck-heads.

It really does sound perverse to me.

And it makes me angry to think that you would even entertain any thoughts about having rights to a vagina. It’s just sick and twisted. I mean, really, is that all you think about? How to continue to degrade women and attempt to take us down?

My guess is that you know how powerful we are and it scares you. You can’t and won’t take us down without a fight.

We’re not going to tolerate this and we are fed up, sick and tired of fighting for things that we already fought for.

If you want our vote, then quit talking about punishing vaginas. And while you’re at it, quit focusing on gay people as well. It really is creepy knowing that all you talk about is vaginas and gay sex. You really do seem to be hung up on people’s private parts and people’s sex lives.

If you want our vote, then make an attempt to focus on a real issue that needs change. Pull your head out of your ass and tackle a something issue. Be a hero. Change the world.

See, I am on to you. The Republicans have had control and they’ve never outlawed abortion or done even half of what they said they were going to do. You don’t really want to do this–you just want to talk about and get people all stirred up. You know in your heart of hearts if you even try to do this, you’re going to piss off women and most men know, that’s not a good idea.

Think about it. Bwahahahahahaha!

Sincerely, The Vagina Movement.

Diana May-Waldman- Bureau Editor for Worldwide Hippies in Rochester NY. Diana is the author of A Woman’s Song. Her poetry in this book deals with the struggles facing all women and the many facets of being a woman in the world today. She is a strong women’s and children’s advocate. A true example of the Hippie movements continuing growth and sprit. Diana’s activism is an inspiration to many. http://www.facebook.com/profile